After few weeks, I managed to get an accommodation and I also got a job as a program assistant (provide assistance for program directors/advisors and schedule departmental classes). Tade was not happy about the idea of moving someplace else but I insisted.
“You heard your mum the other day. I don’t want to live off anybody o,” I protested.
“Haba nau! She didn’t mean it that way and you know it,” he countered. “By the way, you’re not living off her, I make my money, you know. It’s not as if I’ll ask her for money to sustain you. It’s my money and I am all too glad to spend it on you.”
“Ehen, so that she will say I’m living off her son, abi? Po-ta-to, po-tah-to. Wo, nkankan na la n so. We are saying the same thing. I sha don’t want to live off anybody.”
“Arinola, stop being ridiculous jare. Kuku say you don’t want to live with us and stop trying to prove what is not.”
I wasn’t moved. “Okay, I don’t want to live with you o. So tan? Are you satisfied?”
“Perhaps you don’t even love me gan sef. You can confess too. Kuku jewo tan.”
I laughed sarcastically. “It has nothing to do with that and you know it. If you must know, I love you gan ni but I am still moving to my own space…where I can breathe easier.”
The subtle reference to his mum was not lost on him. “That’s not fair o. Nobody disturbs you here. Mum doesn’t bother you, or does she?” He sounded pained.
“All I know is that she isn’t really down with me living here with you.” I tried to do ‘damage control’, “the other day sef, I overheard her say, “e sa i ti fe ara yin,” and she is right about that. We’re not yet married. I agree with her submission.”
My line of argument seemed to placate him so he let the matter rest for a while. Not too long after that, he started marriage talks. He sha wanted me under same roof dandan dandan. Na by fire by force eee??
He proposed, we got engaged. Wedding plans started in earnest. By the way, Tade’s relationship with my parents was smooth. He was ‘padi padi’ with my younger brother too. My family took the news with excitement. Tade’s mum didn’t object but she was not overtly excited as well. Tade was always quick to jump to her defence anytime she displayed lack of interest, claiming she was just not naturally disposed to show outward emotion. Icequeen tinz…na wah o. Anyway, I was deliriously in love and simply turned a blind eye. Besides, Tade seemed to ‘fight for our love’ in his own way and that was more than enough for me.
Wedding plans didn’t go down without accompanying hitches, though. Our first big row happened when out of the blues, Tade announced the postponement of the scheduled date for our introduction. We had planned to visit Nigeria together with his mum (at least that was what he told me) and do the ‘mo mi n mo e’ (this was the only ‘feferity’ we planned to stage in Nigeria so the plan, mostly my plan actually, was to somewhat slot in some ‘engagement’ details, dasall) then get married in US.
“Why?” I asked calmly.
“Mum can’t travel at that time,” he responded.
“May I know why?” I was already on edge, “is she sick or something?”
“Rara o. She’s fine. She simply can’t travel yet.”
“Says who? Shey iwo lo n soro abi momsie?”
“O bere niyen. You are getting all riled up over a simple matter,” he countered.
“Ki ni mo bere? Can’t I ask a simple question? At least, I should have the decency of providing my parents with an explanation when I break the news to them, isn’t it?”
In short, ‘her majesty’ had told her son that she was not in the mood to return to Nigeria and celebrate after just burying her husband not too long ago – e don dey near one year o. As far as I was concerned, that was another expression of her displeasure about who her son hooked up with and she was simply deploying tactics to stall the process – perhaps somewhere along the line, something would give and the idea would be jettisoned altogether! I voiced my thoughts to Tade. He didn’t see it from my point of view. He even accused me of painting his mother black. We had a big fight.
To be cont’d…
© 2017 AyotundeElegbeleye
Jesus is LORD!